sarahkeilman94:

when i was little i thought food poisoning meant that someone had literally poisoned your food and one time my sister got food poisoning from mccdonalds so i told everyone at school that the drive thru guy tried to kill my sister

(via stand)


254,398 notes · 13 minutes ago · reblog

urbancatfitters:

if u watch closely while i take tests u can see me mouthing profanity at the test paper

(Source: urbancatfitters, via sectumsempraaaaaaa)


757,422 notes · 1 day ago · reblog
BREAKING NEWS BREAKING NEWS BREAKING NEWS

mrceline:

letsgetcheesecake:

image

Hank Green has now publicly said that Sam Pepper will no longer be welcome at VidCon.

image

(via sectumsempraaaaaaa)


58,784 notes · 1 day ago · reblog
In order for Tumblr to change their policy…Reblog if you want the 250 post limit to be removed.

hitlerthestripper:

theydontbelieveher:

blueeyedintelligence:

ask-hazy:

REBLOG LIKE AN ULTIMATE DIGIMON

THIS NEEDS MORE NOTES

nope sorry no more reblogs cause we’ve all hit POST LIMIT GODDAMMIT

imageyou motherfucker tumblr

(via sectumsempraaaaaaa)


182,640 notes · 1 day ago · reblog
Guy on train: I'd fuck you if you didn't have so many tattoos.
Me: *turns up music*
Guy: I said I'd fuck you if you didn't have so many tattoos!
Me: *takes off headphones* Leave. Me. Alone.
Guy: Why the fuck do you have so many tattoos?
Me:
Guy: Are you fucking deaf as well as a piece of trash?
Lady by door: Hey. Leave her alone.
Guy: Are you her trash girlfriend? Fucking dykes, all tattooed like fucking men. Disgusting waste of pussy.
Lady: *moves forward, carefully moves jacket so only I can see the badge on her belt* Are you okay?
Me: Fine. Just wish he'd go away.
Lady cop: I can make that happen.
Guy: Oh, yeah, bitch? Who the fuck are you? I'll kill you!
Lady cop: And that's what I was waiting for. *grabs guy, holds him against the door* Harassing women on the train was enough, but you just threatened a cop. You're battin' a thousand tonight.
Entire train: *applauds*

544,024 notes · 1 day ago · reblog
flairey:

my officemates and i were arguing about the difference between a mouse and a rat so i googled it
and there we go
the difference is a rat plays jazz

charlesoberonn:

zanetheaiden:

u readin this?

u a princess.

i dont care if youre a goddamn bodybuilder, ur now princess protein

image

(via sectumsempraaaaaaa)


102,688 notes · 1 day ago · reblog

chrisynova:

a moment of silence for all those cool ideas you had when you were falling asleep that you totally thought you’d remember but tragically didn’t in the morning.

(via iwasrepeals)


184,986 notes · 1 day ago · reblog

phobias:

why you should date me; i’m 6’6 so if we go to concerts you can ride on my shoulders and see everything 

(via stand)


105,923 notes · 1 day ago · reblog